Ya know...getting older ain't fun, I mean to tell ya! Bad enough I got a gamey heart muscle, but now it likes to remind me every so often that it's still there and acting up! Started having chest pains off and on for about two weeks. This, mind you, was AFTER I'd seen my TWO, count 'em, TWO cardiologist doctors AND having a "second opinion" test regimen work-up by Doctor Number Two. Yep, I gotta heart, and yep, it's still there. So, I ask, why does it wait until the week AFTER I see my expensive test-runners/consultants BEFORE acting up?

Sheesh! Thought my ticker was gonna pop outta my chest there for a time! Now, what that means is...I was getting just a wee bit too worked up over everyday life, meaning I get upset easily, as in I get angry and frustrated REAL easy having to deal with...uh...folks of questionable intellectual abilities! Here I am, off-work and disabled for coronary artery disease which will NEVER improve or get better--I will only slowly slide into the long dirt-nap, and these twinkle-toe specimens of humanity just annoy the heck outa me with stupid questions and tests and MORE paperwork on a monthly basis!

Yes, I KNOW I shouldn't complain--it's all routine and none of it is "personal," but it still bothers me greatly to have these folks asking...no, demanding that I provide them with the SAME paperwork and doctors' notes and such, over and over again! Ain't enough to just "up-date" the paperwork with the lastest doctor visit confirming that I'm still sick and disabled and will be for the rest of my life, and will never, ever, "get better." *sigh*

This, then, is my "punishment" for having been a "civil servant" and "bureaucrat" for the last 22 years of my life! I passed out the pointless crap and now I have to suck it up! This "situation" is exactly what deadened my soul with endless, pointless, quadruplicate forms and caused the mental break-down combined with the physical stress on the old bod! I really don't like who I have become. I let the bassards "get me down" and only too literally, break my heart!

Oh yes, I'm not shirking the responsibility here--I know MY part in being where and how I am today, but I didn't get here all on my own. I had help tearing down the mind and body, and yes...the spirit. I admit it. I allowed myself to be crushed and actively put myself in the position to make it all happen.

I know this isn't about "Joe-stuff," but I had to say it out in the open where folks could read for themselves why my life has changed so dramatically, and I don't always "play with my Joes" like I would like to do. Some days...it's a check in the "Win" column when I get out of bed on my own.

As soon as I feel better and can start playing with the troops again, I promise to post some real Joe pix of stuff I have done or been doing over the last two years or so--since the LAST time I had a major "coronary incident," as the doctors like to put it! Until then...I gotta "take it easier" than I have been, and just mellow out before I really work myself up into a state of extreme and intense anxiety and frustration and get my ticket punched, permanent-like! I doubt that would be any fun a'tall!

Thank you for reading. There's no time like the present to "have a great Joe-day!" It's nice weather out there--go out and play!

It's taken long enough, but I re-claimed my blog! With various complcations in my life, the blog fell by the wayside and when I tried to get it going--I had a whole new ballgame on my hands! I tried a few times to re-connect, but nothing worked.

Well gloriosky! I finally got in! Hoorah! Now I have more time on my hands, (a story for another time,) I hope to publish more stuff and get things cranking! Lawd knows, I got dem busy fingers just a-typin' away here! :)

Say hey to all the nice people, Alphonse!

I'm trying to post a pic--let's see what happens.

Alrighty then...it works. Somehow. This is my "n"th try at making this picture show up here. Can't say as to why it worked this time and not the previous several attempts. Damned good thing there ain't nothing to throw around here and that I don't have a mallet to "push any button to continue."

Regardless of my little joke about the frustration of dealing with computers, how ya like my new/old vintage Adventure Team Land Adventurer guy-dude? Of course, I had to dress him up in new duds instead of vintage garb to establish him firmly a part of the new millennium instead of stuck in the past. We're all growing older as evidenced by my heart attack business, and Joe is no exception...except Joe is not subject to "sudden death incidents" like us mortal folk. Shucks...Joe could end up surviving into the next millennium with a little luck and some care by his next couple of owners after I'm worm food!

I found Joe on E-bay. I 'spect his previous owner was some mercenary, gold-digging, non-Joe-head interested only in the shekels that Joe would bring to his or her pockets. Joe is more important than simply cash money in hand--Joe's serious business. Joe's about re-creating memories and making new memories where there had only been fantasies. Joe rides the new ATV I found on sale at Tractor Supply Co. around the same time as I found Joe. He wears a shirt from the Combat Photographer set of some years back, a fedora from Project Are, I believe it to be, and sunglasses from "I think" a So/tW modern Desert Storm combat set of some type.

The picture was taken with my new digital camera that I am learning to use, (with some degree of difficulty.) The set for the photo I built on my work table in my Joe-room. I wanted a place where I could work on Joe things without disturbing the Lady Graemon and without cluttering-up the house, (which is how I would disturb The Lady Graemon.) That's real dirt, a few real cactus plants, and some Michael's silk- and plastic plants, too, on my out-door/in-door photo set. Pretty neat stuff, h'uh? Just the sort of thing I wanted to do as a kid, but couldn't, due to lack of knowledge and lack of money to make things happen.

I have more to do, but that'll have to wait for another day or night, as the case may be. I'm back to work after recovering from my heart attack and open-heart surgery--what a pain--metaphorically. Work is such a bother. I just don't have anywhere near enough time to do the things I want to do without "work" cutting into my time! But, well...it was nice to get a small taste of "retirement" even if I did have to have a major illness to get a break. But, next time...I think I'll try something a little more conventional to get time off if needed, like maybe just take vacation time. Hospitals suck, and medical people in hospitals annoy me greatly, no offense intended if you happen to be a medical type person that works in a hospital. Except...I wish YOU a 2 week stay of your very own medicine if you are a medical-type. Maybe you'll learn something about how shitty I was treated while debilitated, dis-advantaged, and unable to properly defend myself. Now, I'm whole and relatively hearty and I DARE you medicos to mess with me like you did then! I will ruin your day!

More Joes to come in the near future. I was busy while on recovery! You'll see! :)

I had a pretty good thing going when I started this blog--it was fun and I had some ideas for it. But, I sorta fell apart since last September, but I've got a good excuse--heart problems! Yah, really, and it ain't like "my dog ate my home-work."

No, as in "I had a heart attack."

Remember I wrote about stopping smoking and how I had to "die" to quit smoking? I was really rather prophetic. I almost DID die and I was failing quickly before the surgeon got me onto the table. I don't know if YOU know what happens in a heart by-pass surgery, but the surgeon actually has to stop your heart from beating while he patches up the veins and arteries serving the heart muscle. Technically, your heart stops beating, but you don't officially die because you are hooked up into a machine that continues to oxygenate your blood and circulates it through your body.

But, in a manner of speaking, you DO die. What else would you call it when your heart stops beating for a few hours? It takes a while for the surgeon to fix that defective heart and grafting in new arteries to by-pass the blockages!

So, as far as I'm concerned--call me dramatic if you wish--I died for a few hours and was "resurrected" into a second-chance life. (But don't worry--I'm at home now, recuperating from my "sudden death incident," as the medical pros prefer to call a heart attack.)

And I HURT. Every day I hurt. It's been four weeks now since the operation and I hurt, dammit! My chest hurts where they cracked me open. My back hurts. They split open my breast bone and spread open the chest cavity just like you see in those horrible creepy "hack-and-slash, mad scientist" movies and those equally horrible "reality" TV shows! Open heart surgery is no fun for the patient, let me tell you!

OK? That's the reality of what happened to me recently. What about events leading up to the heart attack and what about this business of a second-chance life?

Well, I was failing in my every-day life. Not so you'd notice anything highly dramatic, but I was tired all the time and slooooow. I took naps whenever I could. I could wake up in the morning, go for a few hours, take a nap in the afternoon, go for a few more hours, nap again in the evening, wake up and go until bed-time, and sleep a full night through. Yah, really! Made my wife crazy.

And, of course, it all makes sense, now, because I was slowly strangling myself from oxygen throughout my body. My arteries at the time of the heart attack were essentially closed off, except for a tiny trickle making it through one of three arteries--a 10 per cent trickle, was all that was keeping me alive for months and maybe even years. Two arteries were totally blocked and the third was down to a 90 percent blockage! 10 per cent was all that was keeping me alive!

Weird, isn't it? Wierder still, is that about 50 per cent of everyone that has a heart attack dies from it! AND...The first indication of arterial blockage like mine is usually a heart attack. It doesn't show up on EKG tests or stress tests--walking on tread mills hooked up to EKG's. And yes, I've had a stress test before and nada! Nothing for a cardiologist to look at and say, "you got a problem."

So, but for the Grace of God, go I. I coulda died, but didn't. Yet. I could die tomorrow or I could die in 20 or 30 years yet to come--no way to know until it happens.

So what am I gonna do with my "second-chance life?" There's a good question, aye? I started this blog because I enjoyed writing about GI Joe and 1/6th stuff. You may notice that I haven't written much about 1/6th for some time now. I think maybe there's a good reason for that that I might discuss in the near future.

Or...I just might get back to talking Joe stuff and be done with all this hard-core reality stuff--I haven't decided yet.

Thanks for reading.

I can't believe it's been two months since I last made a post! Time flies and there's just way too much stuff to do, which seems to preclude playing with Joes or rpg's. Crud!

I was cranking out some Joe Marines a while back and just lost interest mid-way during the project. It was like running out of gas in your car--I just sorta coasted off to the side and stopped. Not that I don't like Marines or Joes. I just ran down. I haven't really found anything else to get the fire stoked up again, either. This is a sign of Joe burn-out, just like ya get burned-out at work--too many things to do, too many choices, and too many changes, and phuuut--yer all done, buddy!

I know it's happened, but I'm not entirely sure how to get revved up again. But I'm confident I will--I'm also seeing the signs of interests returning. Now--if ONLY "stuff" stops happening to cut into my Joe time! The Holidays are upon us once again, and that promises some amount of "down time" from the routine "aggravations and frustrations."

The major sign that tells me things are on the upward swing are an interest returning about my modern troops, with all their woodland camo clothes. Over the past few months, I was lucky enough to find a number of 21st Century Modern Infantry sets on E-bay--a few I didn't have from before 21C crashed and burned, and a few duplicates of some of their better, more complete Woodland outfits. I call them "the better sets" because they come with bayonets, helmets and entrenching tools, as well as a few other cool things.

My "thing" and my gripe about most of the toy soldier manufacturers is that they don't reproduce the common "infantryman" gear. The one most common trait between soldiers is that they get issued a certain "package" of equipment for their use. To an old Army dog like me, this is called their "initial issue" and TA-50 gear. "Initial issue" is all their basic clothing--shorts, pants, boots, underwear, etcetera--all the basic items they need to clothe themselves under most routine conditions. "TA-50" or "organizational issue" as it's sometimes called, is all the basic "fighting and outdoor living" gear they need while assigned to their permanent station unit--things like their pup tent, web gear, over shoes, winter parka, field pack/rucksack, canteens, protective mask, etc. Now, I KNOW it would cost a ton of cash to outfit a 1/6th troop to the standards of a "real" troops, but I don't think it's necessary to go the full nine yards on the issue. It would be "nice" to have the option or luxury to buy the little "fiddly" parts to equip a 1/6th troop, but NOT as part of a boxed set like Dragon's "Soldat" series, but Dragon had the right idea, just not a proper solution IMHO. I'm thinking you make a basic troop and several accessory sets to add the details, very much the "razors and blades" concept pioneered by GI Joe back in the 60's and 70's.

Anyway--I digress. I feel like I need to trick out a few modern troops real soon. We'll see how that goes because I am NOT the most prolific modeller east of the Big Muddy, doncha know? I'm big on "plotting and planning" stuff, but not so good carrying those ideas to completion.

New stuff

I got around to finishing my three part series about the influences that have impacted my 1/6th GI Joe collection, but found I still had "stuff" roaming around inside my head. There was more that needed to get out into the blog. I'm still working against the self-editing problem, though, so I felt like I just had to jump in to see what needed saying. Hope it doesn't bore you.

E-bay. Yup, I've been following E-bay for several months now since none of the regular retail stores carry much 1/6th stuff. For years I've known about E-bay, but I also heard tons of "BS" stories about deals gone wrong and folks losing their money and their possessions thru bad deals. Well, thanks to The Lady Graemon, my lovely spouse, she actually decided to go "E-baying" all on her own to work at enlarging her collections of various things. She had very few problems and entirely satisfactory experiences while shopping E-bay, so I had to give it a try.

I was quite astounded at the variety of 1/6th stuff available on E-bay. I jumped in with both feet when I saw what I was missing. I've done well, maybe too well, enlarging my collection by buying up other people's stuff. Most of what I have purchased has been Mint-in-box figures and accessory sets. Very little have I bought that was loose and "played with." For the greatest part, I have been entirely happy and satisfied with my auction winnings.

There have been a few "not-so-good" deals. One "lot" of 21st Century Toys Sams was not well described on the auction and when I finally got it into my possession, I was disappointed with what I had purchased. The seller did NOT mis-represent anything. It was my fault because I "thought" I knew what I was seeing in the seller's photographs of the lot items, but what I got was "slightly" different. Almost everything in the lot I purchased had been kit-bashed into something "resembling" the items as they originally appeared in the boxed set editions as released by 21C. They were NOT what the original items were when released. Details were different and detail items were missing from the original boxed sets--things like this. My fault, not the seller, and I don't mean to imply there was anything the seller did wrong or deceptive.

This was definitely a case of "buyer beware" and "ask lots of questions" if something doesn't look right in those slightly dark, slightly fuzzy photos on the auction page.

Now, I don't want to dwell on this, but not every seller is an up-standing, forthright, fine human being and great American citizen. Some are, shall we say, only out to make a buck. In the 1/6th On-line community, we generally take efforts to make sure we communicate with our trading partners and to give fair measure in our inter-community trading practices and purchases. On E-bay a different set of rules is in force. The biggest and most important rule is: Don't assume your trading partner will be a fine, fair, up-standing person! The seller or buyer on the other end of your auction may be amateurish, un-professional, rude, and a rip-off artist. Sorry, but that's the reality of E-bay. And "feedback," while a noble idea in theory, has it's "limitations," shall we say. Just because somebody has a lot of positives doesn't mean what you think it means. read, really "read" the comments to see what's going on. Sure, there are "rules" on E-bay. Learn them well.

Enough of that--let me tell you the good stuff! E-bay actually has begun helping me figure out more parameters and complete my collections by providing items that I have searched for for years, without success. Not only is it helping me solidify ideas about my Joe collection, but since I also collect some role-playing games, E-bay has brought a number of items to complete my game collections for Traveller and Twilight:2000! It's nice to "pursue" items in a collection, but I grow tired of the constant searching. I want to "be done" with looking for select items to finish my interests in these RPG's. I want to "have" them, not look for them anymore.

Recently, I found several sellers of older "out-of-print" modules for my games, and I bought 'em, too! I almost have everything printed that I want for Twilight:2000. There are only a very few items left that I don't have. Same goes for Traveller--I am very close to "finishing" having all the core "canon" materials for the Traveller Universe printed by the original manufacturer and the several "authorized" licensees. Now, this doesn't mean I have "everything." It means I have almost everything I think I want and need for my collection of these gaming systems. There are some items that were made by somewhat obscure companies that are quite rare as to be almost unobtainable. I don't care about those things. I just want "core" products.

Give you two examples: there is a gaming module for Twilight: 2000 made by a company about a scenario for Los Angeles, California. Very rare--only seen it available one time for over $100. I passed on that. It was the only item I know about that covered that subject and the only product I know about NOT made by the original manufacturer of T2K. Second example is a board game made for the Traveller Universe. Again, very rare, but made by the original manufacturer. I've seen it available twice and both times I lost out on the bidding for them. It WON'T happen a third time, if I EVER see that particular game available again in my life-time.

Back to GI Joe and E-bay--when I bought some of these items from E-bay and actually took possession of them, it occurred to me that I needed to re-think my Joe collection (which covers ALL my various figures,) and my organization. How many MORE figs did I need? More precisely, how many more figs did I think I wanted? And why?

Good questions, don't you think? I do. I never sat down and seriously entertained those questions before. Really. I collect, therefore I am! Sure, I know there's all kinds of collectors of Joe out there. They all have many reasons why and what they collect for Joe-stuff.

Truth is--I don't have an answer for myself--yet. I got some ideas, but that's NOT GOOD ENOUGH for me, anymore. I need an answer that satisfies ME. That's what E-bay has done to me and for me--made me stop and think.

If I come up with an answer, I'll let you know. Until then, I'm gonna have a ton of fun this winter putting together my collections and my newest acquisitions and making a coherent, cohesive "whole" for all my stuff. I got started in this Joe collection stuff because I wanted to create 1/6th figures that represented my role-playing characters. Have I totally lost that concept along the way? I don't think so. As I have found these Traveller and Twilight:2000 items, as well as older and newer Joe-stuff, I find my thoughts traveling back to that age when my interests were more "imaginary" and less materially "concrete." I liked my character creations that could battle dragons and space monsters, or survive in a war-torn world devastated by warfare in a time contemporaneous with my military experiences. My intent at the time was to create 1/6th figures that I could photograph and use as a visual representation while playing my games and writing my stories. I've lost that original intent, I think it's safe to say, but I can gain it back IF I choose, and carry out my intent in a way that wasn't even possible when I started this 1/6th collection more than a decade ago.

I think I may have answered my own questions while telling you about E-bay.

Influences, Part Three

Well, it took long enough but I finally decided to finish off this series that I started some time back. Mostly it was done, but needed a few last touches before I published it on the blog. Tonight was the night, so it seemed. So, the conclusion of the series.

Role-playing games

If you are NOT familiar with role-playing games, maybe you have heard of Dungeons and Dragons? That's an example of an "rpg," role-playing game, as insiders call them. If you've never heard of rpg's or Dungeons and Dragons, a role-playing game is a game where the players imagine themselves as a character in an imaginary or fantastic circumstance or setting and "play" as if they were the character, such as a wizard, a soldier, or a space traveller. There are literally hundreds of different rpg's available on the market as these games have been around for most of 30 years now. In truth, if you think about it--they are much older than that, because a role-playing game is nothing more than playing "make-believe" as we did as small children. We could pretend to be nurses, doctors, cowboys, indians, soldiers, firemen, teachers, monsters, spacemen, policemen, detectives--any number of "characters" that our childhood imagination could come up with!

RPG's are exactly the same thing, but for older kids and adults, with very carefully established "rules" for settling circumstances, problems and conflicts. You could, if you wish, assign values to each character to give a "quantification" of each character's level of skill or attribute, for comparison purposes, and to determine outcomes of contests between characters, such as combat, success in wound treatment, persuading an enemy to surrender, piloting a space craft, shooting a weapon, or any number of various "contests" of strengths and skills. Assigning attributes would give characters ratings in intelligence, beauty, strength, endurance, or other physical, mental, or emotional characteristics.

Anyway, the point being the influence that rpg's had on me as I play with my Joes. As I have acquired my various Joes over the years, I name them and give them assignments within my "organization," as I have previously described. Some are officers, like Brigadier Graemon and Colonel Guile, some are doctors, like (Major) Doctor Devoreaux, some are pilots, like Major Cunningham, and so on. For some of the characters, I have written back-stories about the characters--where they came from, what experiences they've had, how they acquired the skills they have--all central concepts from rpg's, to give meaning, purpose, and depth to my many, simple Joes. Someday, if needed, I can assign those attributes to each character and use them in an actual 1/6th war-game or role-playing game of my design. It all adds play-value to my troops and collection! It all depends on how much time and effort I choose to invest in my figures.

Hasbro, when they invented Joe, gave him a sketchy back-ground to begin with. According to Vincent Santelmo, an author that researched the origins behind GI Joe at Hasbro, each of the four basic figures, the soldier, the sailor, the marine, the airman--all had simple names. I can't remember that GI Joe was actually marketed with those names, but they had 'em! The soldier was Joe, the marine paratrooper was Rocky, the sailor was Skip, and the airman was Ace, a fighter pilot. So, ya see--Hasbro worked GI Joe from the beginning, as discrete individuals, in each of the services.

Flash Force

Flash Force is an imaginary unit under the grandiose United States Department of Counter-Terrorism. It's a group of collectors that operate on Yahoo groups. These guys established standards and practices for their collections, giving their 1/6th troops uniforms, titles, and assignments. I can't really tell you too much about them, but I don't KNOW that much--I've only seen a few of their websites. They are fantastic, those I've seen. They made up maps of their "bases," pictures of their building interiors, pictures of their troops in training and on operations, vehicles, stories, aircraft, ranks, awards and Gawd knows what-all! The group really takes Joes and Sams to an entirely different level, from simple dust-collecting shelf-warmers, and makes them a "real" working combat and support unit assisting the United States government! It's an absolute hoot to see the fantastic imaginations and work these fellas have put into their collections!

When I saw what these guys had done, it really helped my ideas "gel" into what my collection is today. The Flash Force serves as a "model" model agency for the organization and presentation of a 1/6th collection!

OK, there it is. These are the major influences that have helped shape my collection of Joes, Sams, Dragons, BBI's, Lanards, Power Teamers, Cy's, and all the rest, into one fairly cohesive "whole," at least in my mind--the Special Services and Security Force. Hope ya liked to read about it, and more importantly, I hope you might have picked up an idea or two, to use as your own. But, even if you didn't, and you just go on with your collection of "whatever" 1/6th figures, I wish you well, and I wish you fun, relaxation, and personal pleasure with your wonderful collections of 1/6th soldiers, sailors, coasties, marines, airmen, police, fire, Adventure teamers, and fem-figs!